Start in the Dark

It was a snowy Saturday in January. I was wrapped up in two blankets, nestled deep into my oversized comfy chair while holding a big bowl of fresh popcorn dripping in butter. The stage was set for a perfect, lazy evening.

I am a sucker for a good documentary, and the movie of choice that night was Free Solo.

This film tells the story of Alex Honnold, who was attempting to ascend El Capitan in Yosemite National Park. Getting to the top would require a 3,000-foot vertical climb. The unique element to this pursuit is the fact that Alex wanted to do this “solo,” which meant he wanted to climb El Capitan with no ropes, no safety net, and nothing to brace him from a 3,000-foot fall.

Alex wanted to do something that had never been done before.

To survive, he would need to execute a perfect climb. One mistake, one misstep, one split second of not paying attention would cost him his life. There was zero room for error.

The good news – for most of us – is that our pursuits in life don’t require perfection. Often, we can make a mistake and simply learn from it. A career change, relocating, or going back to school, these are not life-and-death decisions that require perfection.

For two hours, I watched Alex contort his body into uncomfortable positions. His arms and legs would be stretched in ways that were unnatural and appeared to be painful. There were countless times when he would be gripping the face of the rock with just two or three fingers in each hand. He would wedge one arm deep into a crack to hold his entire body in place. Then, with his other hand, he would let go as he reached for the next thing to grab onto.

I found myself thinking, “There has to be an easier way!” But doing something that has never been done before requires us to be uncomfortable. These moments of lateral contortion were all a part of his forward progress.

On a regular basis, I find myself – on my own journeys – fighting the discomfort. I have learned that stretching myself in new ways can be both uncomfortable and a part of the process. Two different things can coexist.

A few days before Alex attempted his solo climb, he and his film crew visited El Capitan to discuss where the sun would land on the rockface at various points throughout the day. To get the footage they wanted, Alex would need to start the climb at 4am, and it would be pitch black. For Alex, and for many of us, our most important journeys start in the dark.

The day arrived when Alex was to attempt the climb, but after a few minutes on El Capitan, he called it off. While he didn’t say it directly, it was clear he was concerned about risking his life with a film crew present.

A few days later, without telling anyone, he returned to El Capitan to try and summit again. Thankfully, his film crew had a feeling this might happen, and they were in place with remote cameras to capture the moment. For Alex, this climb wasn’t about putting on a show, he wasn’t doing it for the accolades; he was doing it because he knew this was his journey. He wanted and needed to do this for himself, not for a documentary.

We would all benefit from the same mindset. Sometimes, we need to navigate the road in front of us simply because this is our path to walk. Maybe you, too, have experienced a deep knowing, the feeling that there is something you just have to do.

To reach the summit, Alex had to go alone, start in the dark, and repeat a pattern for 3,000 feet: hold on tight, let go, and reach for the next thing to hold on to.

If you want to do something that hasn’t been done before, something of significance, or if you want to reach new and higher ground, Alex has left you some great instructions.   

I hope this week you will be brave as you hold on tight, let go, and reach for your next safe spot.

What you are doing may not be life-and-death, but it is your life, and it is worth living.

You may start alone and in the dark, but my experience has been you will never finish alone or in the dark.

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