Carlos, Strangers, and Influence

It was an early Monday morning in late January and I was waiting outside my Los Angeles hotel for my Lyft driver. When Carlos arrived in his cream-colored Hyundai Sonata, I made two quick observations:

1. His vehicle had barely met the minimum standards for a shared ride driver.

2. The car held a faint smell of Whoppers and fries. I was certain if we were to look under the driver’s seat, we would discover a collection of discarded fast food bags.

As we began to make our way towards West Hollywood I asked, “How are you doing today?” His reply was very much to the point. “I’m sad … Kobe, Coronavirus, and a possible third world war. 2020 has been too much.” It was only January.

We rode in silence for 10 minutes and then he dropped me off at the Hollywood Improv. I was attending the two-day “Something to Say Workshop” hosted by Rob Bell. The objective of the event was to gain clarity on the things you want to say, create, or bring to life. We were there to get un-stuck.

As 31 strangers awkwardly entered the room there was an interesting energy in the air. It was a mix of “I have no idea what I’ve gotten myself into” and “this is going to be amazing.” We had all traveled from distant places and come together on a path of shared self-discovery.

Rob opened the event by walking to the front of the room and simply asking, “Who’s stuck?” One by one, strangers joined him on stage. They shared their stories, their hopes and dreams for what they wanted to bring to life, as well as the fears and barriers they were facing along the way. 

In the story of every stranger we each saw our own journey and experiences reflected back to us. As a group we wrestled with some hard questions: Who am I to tell this story? Is this work mine to do? Is it really okay for me to commit to this project?

These strangers shared about the books they wanted to write, the podcasts they wanted to launch, the keynote addresses they wanted to present, and the truth they wanted to speak to power. They shared about the difficult and painful issues they wanted to bring to light. Their interests ranged from autism to abuse, redemption to racial injustice, courtrooms to classrooms, and grandmas to gangs. There was nothing light or easy about any of the topics these strangers felt compelled to align their lives with. This wasn’t an event with people yelling and dancing while others walked barefoot over hot coals. This was a different kind of brave. The fear and danger were mostly internal, but it was very real nonetheless.

I realized this was a room full of world changers and I was soaking up every minute with them. But had you asked them if they were leaders, I am not sure they would have said yes. I am a firm believer that “a leader is a person of influence who uses their influence for good,” and by that definition this room was packed with leaders who were now charged with leading and bringing something to life. And yet, while these were all incredibly gifted and skilled people, deep down we were all dealing with the same fundamental core question: “Who am I to do this work?” And the collective response was always, “You are the perfect person to do this work, who else can do this but you?” Leaders are willing to wrestle with the hard questions to get to the heart of what is limiting the depth of their influence.

After two days together we were no longer strangers. We were now all cheering each other on as we gathered at the intersection of dreams and action. We were united by a common desire to listen to our lives, to wrestle with hard questions, to give witness to what we had seen and heard, and to use our various gifts, skills, and platforms for good in the world. This is what leaders do, they use their influence for good.

So the thing you want to do, the story you want to tell, the podcast you want to launch, the book you want to write, do it, because somewhere in Los Angeles Carlos is sitting in his dated cream-colored Hyundai Sonata, finishing off a Whopper, tucking the bag under his seat, waiting for his next customer, and hoping tomorrow will be a better day.

Carlos is counting on you and strangers have gathered to cheer. 

Are you willing to do the brave thing and use your influence for good? Who else can do this but you?

If you enjoyed this post, please use the social media icons below to share or tweet this blog so others may also benefit.